Wednesday, September 15th was our visit to the US Consulate. We had an interview and took an oath to finalize Willa's Visa. She is no longer a Chinese citizen and when she touches US soil, she will be a US Citizen.
It was actually a pretty emotional ceremony. There was definitely a finality to this whole procedure. Our right hands went down and she was ours! Paul was the one who helped me recognize the moment. After the oath in which I was holding Willa, he took Willa, hugged and kissed her. He then leaned over to me, kissed me, called me "mom", and we hugged as a family; Paul, Willa & me. Tears filled my eyes as the moment and the dream were recognized. Tears of pure happiness!
Paul & Gwyn? Parents? is no longer a question...it is a statement! Paul & Gwyn! Parents!
Tonight, we had dinner with the Weiss's, Brian, Richel and Megan. We went to Lucy's Resturant. It was great to get to know them in person and I look forward to future contact with them, great family. They leave Guangzhou Thursday morning.
The other two families in our travel group leave Thursday as well. They leave from Hong Kong. We are going to have breakfast with them. Our last activity with them. But we do have plans to get together once a year. This sounds wonderful!
We leave Friday morning from Guangzhou back to Beijing. We have a 5 hour layover in Beijing. Then we fly to Chicago (13 hrs). When we go through customs/immigration, Willa becomes a US citizen! Then we fly to Minneapolis. We arrive in Minneapolis at 8:22 pm. It is going to be a long traveling day, but the reward will be being home.
So, Thursday is our last day in Guangzhou. We have a couple of gifts to get and Willa's Visa will arrive today. It will be a great day!
Willa had a tough night because of a cough, so we all laid low most of the day. Our only big event was our Red Couch pictures. The babies were dressed in traditional clothing and posed on the White Swan Hotels famous red couches. It really didn't go too smoothly. Willa had a hard time holding herself up and the other two were a little scared of all the attention. It was fun to see the girls together and to get our first real family picture.
Let me finally introduce you to our traveling group. There are only three families in our group. This was actually perfect. We really got to know each other, and Paul and I really enjoy being with them. First, we have the McIntyre family. Doug and Nancy are here for their second daughter, Lily. They came to China with their first daughter, Rose (7 1/2 yrs) and Nancy's sister, Marion. It is really nice to be here with someone who has gone through this process before. It has really been a gift. The second family is Debra Sholl. Debra is here to get her first baby, Sophie. She came to China with her sister, Lisa. We have been on all the tours together and we got our babies together. The longer we are here, the more connected I feel to them.
Yesterday, we went to a Buddhist Temple to get the babies blessed. It was a beautiful site and even though it was raining, the value was not diminished. Definitely worthwhile. Then we went to a government store, where we bought a porcelain tea set from Jianxi province (Willa's province), a beautiful Jade bangle, and stamp with Willa's Chinese name (a Chop). We went back to Shamian Island where the White Swan Hotel is, and did some more shopping. All in all, a pretty great day!
Even though Paul was completely tired of shopping, today was a bit of the same. We went to a Pearl Market. It was incredible. It was a huge mall, all dedicated to jewelry (every store). Then we went to a whole sale shop. It was crazy! Everything was sooo inexpensive. I wish I had more money. I could have gotten gifts for everyone. It was another great day out.
So, the last couple of days have been a little rough. Nanchang being a little less inviting than Beijing. Paul and I felt a little cooped-up in our hotel. It was a beautiful hotel, but it wasn't home. It was a long week. At the end of that week, I got a SICK and was out of commission the night of the 7th and the day of the 8th. Paul was single parent for the day. He did awesome. He had to change his first "stinky" diaper. Proud to say, no gagging! Now, Paul is still battling an "iffy" stomach.
Then on the 8th and 9th, Willa became "Whining Willa". She cried from the morning til night, only to stop crying to eat. We were scared. We started wondering if those first few days were a fluke? A ploy to make us love her..do do do...and then poof, new Willa. This morning, we discovered the root of the problem. Willa cut her first tooth! We got a major first, a first tooth....and... a second by the end of the day.
Our flight to Guangzhou went well. And now we are at the White Swan Hotel. It is a beautiful hotel in a very inviting area. Willa got her Visa picture and her medical check-up. Everything went well. She was a trooper. I have to say, I am more comfortable in Guangzhou. However, I am still worried to go out and about. I don't know why. I think it has a bit to do with not liking Nanchang, being a new mom and being home SICK. So that is now the sickness I feel. I want to be home. Tomorrow should help. We are going on a tour and will be getting a Buddist Blessing for Willa. I am really excited about that.
I'll write soon. Hopefully, we'll be a little less SICK.
Willa has a very pleasant personality! She wakes up with a smile! She eats well and is usually content. But how quickly they learn what they like! Willa likes being held. In fact, most of the time she won't let us put her down, the little stinker. No, we know that is good! She likes us and we love her!
Today, we went for a little tour in Nanchang. It was beautiful, but it was HOT, HOT, HOT! One more full day in Nanchang and then we fly to Guangzhou. Both Paul and I are looking forward to that. Neither of us are too into Nanchang. We are in a beautiful, five-star hotel, but we aren't too comfortable in the neighborhood. It's very congested. So it's a bit boring stuck in the hotel.
Yesterday, September 6th, Willa Song Roos legally became ours in China's eyes! We went to the Adoption Center in Nanchang to file all the necessary paperwork. We walked into the room, surprised to find so many other adoptive families waiting. We met with the director of Willa's orphanage (in picture), we were interviewed, we had to sign a million papers and we paid our LARGE donation. When we finally sat down, I looked across the room and I saw two fairly familiar faces, but I was not sure until I saw the face of their baby. The baby turned around and yes it was the Weiss's. Paul and I have met them through my brother-in-law, Dale, but never met face to face. We talked via email and through blogging. It was great to meet them in China. Funny that we had to come to China to meet. We look forward to seeing them again in Guangzhou.
It was a very long wait. And Willa was wonderful. She is so laid back. We were there for over three hours. It was HOT and busy. We were all exhausted after this part of the day. We went back to the hotel for lunch, and again Willa was wonderful. One last stop to the notary office to make it official, but on the way we stopped at Wal-Mart. Very interesting. You were right, Shawn. Very interesting sights...and SMELLS. After we got our supplies, to the notary, we went. This only took a few short minutes. It's official! She's ours!!!!
It all feels right. She feels right. This whole thing is right! We are very happy!
Here is the blog entry we all have been waiting for.
Dear Willa,
Well, we are on the way to get you! We have dreamed of you for a long time. We have prayed for you all our adult lives. We have wanted you from the moment we knew your name. We loved you the moment we heard your story and we are so thankful that we get to be a part of your future story. Your story...that is what this is all about, Your Story!
While we have waited, Willa, we worked on setting up our lives to be able to share it with you. We have worked hard. We have a beautiful home. We have awesome pets, and the most amazing family & friends. They all have been waiting for you as well. There is no pressure...seriously! They love you already. When we meet, I'll tell you all about them. Quite a group of lovely characters!
We are ready for you Willa! We may not know how to make formula or recognize what it is,at that, but we are ready to be your parents!
Love Forever, Your Parents
Today at 4:30 pm, we met Willa for the first time. I didn't recognize her at first. And even though there were only three babies, the commotion was such that I didn't realize what I had until we returned to our rooms. By 6:00 pm, she was smiling at us, laughing ( raspberries on her belly), and babbling to us both. So far she seems relaxed. We are waiting for her to want someone else, but we truly enjoyed our first evening with her. And we look forward to getting to know her better. I'm going to totally embrace this time away from home as a time to get to know our daughter and for her to get to know us.
Day Two in Beijing was just as exciting as the first. We started the day at a Jade factory. Beautiful things! Something we learned, instead of getting a ring for the finger to symbolize marriage, here in China they get a larger ring for the wrist, a Jade bangle. This bangle can be handed down from the husband-to-be's family or become a family heirloom. Very cool! (and pretttty!) It was a neat stop, but I was eager for our next stop. The GREAT WALL was great! The mountains and the terrain were beautiful, and the wall was very impressive. We only had a short time to hike, but Paul and I did pretty well! I would have liked to stay longer and picnic there, but we had a very important plane to catch. Which reminds me again of why we are here! He he, its not just to sight see! Tomorrow, is the day! What a strange reality! Tomorrow, our family becomes three! Paul, Willa and me.
Hello All! Well, I guess we shouldn't be surprised that China has blocked access to the blogspot website for Gwyn and Paul while they are over there. So, long story short, Gwyn will be e-mailing me their updates and I will post them when they arrive. Without further ado, here is their first update from China! ~Betsy
"September 3rd was our first real day in China. We met the two other families that we will be traveling together and getting our babies together. They are lovely people and we enjoyed being with them immediately. We also met our Chinese Representative, Nancy (a very sweet girl).
After introductions, we went sightseeing. It was a full schedule. We went on a Hutong Tour. Hutongs are areas of old Beijing villages. These villages still house people today. We rode through in rickshaws, toured the Mansion of Prince Gong, visited a family who has owned the same Hutong for 5 generations, and had lunch at another. It was a wonderful way to compare the differences of royal life and ordinary lives and a wonderful way to see life today in Beijing.
After lunch, we climbed the drum tower, Beijing's origional CLOCK TOWER. There we saw a demostration of how they were used...very cool. We could see a lot of Beijing from the Drum Tower. Then it was off to the Summer Palace. The Summer Palace was where the "Dragon Queen" lived. She was the Empress Cixi and was one of China's most powerful women. It was beautiful. "Girl Power".
It wasn't until the end of the tour, when I remembered why we were here, to get a baby. The culture is very rich and intoxicating and it's a great distraction while we wait.
Tomorrow, we have another big day of touring. And then we fly to Nanchang where we meet our babies! September 5th in the afternoon is the long awaited moment!!!!!!"
We truly ARE excited as we prepare to leave this morning. It's just early. Lia delivered us to the airport at 7 am. As we pulled up to the airport, my heart started to beat a little faster. This is it! Our next post will be from Beijing!
Paul and I are in the Twin Cities trying to get one last good night's rest before we set off to China. Sleep has been elusive the last couple of weeks, but I hear that sounds like parenthood. So this is the Boot Camp before the Real Thing.
Tomorrow, our flight leaves the Minneapolis Airport at 8:55 am. Then to Chicago and then to Beijing. We should arrive in Beijing around 3:30 pm on September 2nd.
We are nervous that we may not have complete some important paperwork, but we are very excited to be FINALLY GOING! There have been a couple of glitches today, so we are hoping the rest is smooth sailing!
Wish us luck! There's no turning back! Parenthood, here we come!
Today was a productive day, but bumpy, confusing and defeating.
The highlight was that we received our Visas and got our Passports back...ffffffffffffewww. After that, it went down hill and then up and down again. Today, my job was to book the flight. Easy right? WRONG. Because we only have a week before we leave, all the flights were more expensive and less direct.
Our hope was to fly into Beijing and out of Hong Kong. Big negitory! Our hope was to get a flight for under $1500 each (which was the cost two days ago). Guess Not! Our hope was to fly out on September 2nd, but because of my inability to clearly understand my travel agent, we're leaving on the 1st!
I just have to laugh. It is all just so ridiculous!
Yesterday, we received our Travel Approval. This is the date in which we meet with the Chinese Consulate to finalize our adoption, September 16th. That means we need to be in China no later than the 5th and we leave for home on the 17th. So, we are leaving on the 2nd! Yes, the 2nd! Only 10 days away! I thought that we would have 3 to 4 weeks to prepare for this trip (we need 3 to 4 weeks to prepare), but no! We get 10 days.
So, I get this information via email. I go out to tell my business partner that I'll be leaving in 10 days, and my heart starts to beat faster and faster! Yep, anxiety attack. I really didn't know that it was possible to feel all these different emotions at one time. Happy. Excited. Scared. Nervous. Stressed. Confused. Afraid. Just down right overwhelmed. How am I going to do this? I know this is good. I know that this is what we were working towards. But its a lot, a lot of emotions, a lot to prepare, a lot to do before we go. But I know this IS good. Traci said it best, "This is 10 days less that Willa will have to wait for you." Yes, I can do this for her. I can do it!
Last night, I kissed Paul and I told him that he only has 10 days left of not being a DAD. 10 days until we are a family. 10 more days until I'm a mom. We've been waiting a long time for this, and deep down never thought it would happen. Hoped but never believed!
Also, our Visas are on their way today. The ball is rolling...fast. One major thing off that TO DO List! I will definitely blogging more often!
We have been waiting for a long time for Willa and there have been many times in the last 4 1/2 years that would have been perfect timing in our lives. But at this time?
Truly, this couldn't have been a worse time. But my friend, Jessica reminded me, " There is never a right time to have a baby, but there is never a wrong time either." This is my new mantra as I struggle to plan a baby's room around my business expansion. Its my mantra as I try to file for Visas, Adam Walsh forms, fingerprints and homestudies, while I'm answering phones and painting. Its my mantra as no money is coming in, but obsene amounts are going out for the agency, Visas, Adam Walsh, plane tickets, and countless other adoption expenses. That is my mantra as we wait impatiently for our Travel Approval (the dates we get to go and get Willa).
And the funny thing is, my thoughts on why its bad timing have completely changed. What once was "Why now?" is now "I just want Willa TODAY!!!!!!" Enough of this messin' around and waiting one second longer, I want to leave for China NOW!
I apologise for the long lull in baby updates! I've been a bit overwhelmed and unfocused. After a few meltdowns and a lot of tears, I am again focused but no less overwhelmed. So where were we? Ahh yes, Yi Xuao Yuan!
Well yes, let me introduce you to our daughter, Willa Song Roos. We received her referral on the cell phone while driving in the Twin Cities during our vacation on July 15th, 2010. We learned her name, some general information on her health, and that she was 13 pounds. It wasn't until we received her picture, the next day, that we started to believe that she was real...started to believe. She was born in Jiangxi Province on January 14th, 2010. She waits for us today, and for the last 7 months. I think of her there all the time.
If there are any doubts about there being a higher power, a guiding hand, a bigger picture (and throughout this 4 1/2 years, I had my doubts), here's some proof. Paul and I had chosen the name Song at least a year ago, and upon receiving the referral, we learned that Willa Song was discovered and saved by a woman named Song Lan Zhi. Yes, definitely meant to be. And yes, Patty. You're right! Willa is meant for us and we had to WAIT all this time for her. Any earlier, it wouldn't have been her. Any earlier, it wouldn't be right. OUR Willa Song. OUR daughter. A strange, but lovely thought!
We wondered if this day would ever come. We doubted we would ever be parents. Years went by and hopes went aside, but yesterday things changed. Yesterday, we became parents. Yesterday, our lives changed. Yesterday, our phone rang and we learned her name. It was the most beautiful name we ever heard...Yi Xiao Yuan (Dawn Beautiful).
Today, we felt more like parents. Today, we kind of believed. Today, we saw her face. It was the most beautiful face we ever saw...we named her Willa Song.
We will never forget the wait. We will never forget the torture. We will never forget the disappointments along the way, but for some strange reason, by some miracle, we feel no pain, no anger and no regrets. Her face, her name, her existence is why we waited, why we endured. Willa Song Roos is why we took The Silk Road!
All the Christmas Days, all the Mother's Days, all the Father's Days and all the family outings/reunions that have passed, while we have waited. And to think of all our friends who have had kids. One of my close friends had three children, while we waited. I know our whole family feels the pain. I know the whole family looks forward to our baby's arrival. And I know our whole family worries about Paul and I. Knowing all of this, sometimes makes things more difficult. Not only do we worry about our own feelings, we feel guilty for hurting those close to us as well and for letting them down. Tensions run high and opinions are viewed as attacks. So, I apologize now for all the times that I took your suggestions so poorly. I do not mean to take it out on you.
Then how did we wait so long without loosing our minds and without dwelling on our frustrations? We started a business. It worked! Along with my dream of being a mom, I have always wanted to open a gymnastics' gym. And so we did. September 2008, we opened our doors to Northern Twistars Gymnastics and with that, my life and my mind were consumed with a new obsession.
Every time our wait was extended, we would grieve. At first, it was frustration, then it was painful, and finally, you are just pissed off. At different points throughout this excruciating wait, we sought other avenues or options. But we were always told the same thing, "Well, you only have 8 more months of waiting if you stick with China. Any other avenue will take at least a year. Stay your course. It's less than a year away." We listened and it bit us in the butt over and over. For 3 1/2 years, we stayed the course and felt like idiots doing so. Paul and I have always taken pride in the fact that we are patient and laid back. Now, we know those characteristics are not all positive. At times, they are flaws.
All of this frustration, pain and anger build up and soon you aren't able to deal with it. I remember one day telling my friends (colleagues) that we just got word that our wait would be another 8 months. I remember crying and one friend saying, "Well, Gwyn. It's not on your time. It's on God's time." I wanted to bite her head off. I know she was trying to be comforting and she may very well be right. But it was not what I wanted to hear. I needed to hear, "I am so sorry." "That just sucks." "I am so sorry this is happening to you." or "I'm here for you." I know that it is hard to know what to say when someone is going through a loss. And in adoption, you are dealing with loss over and over. Every time something falls through or every time your wait is extended, you imagine the children you just lost.
It wasn't until 2004, now almost 29 years old, when we started again on our adoption story. So close to being 30, we chose our path and started traveling Our Silk Road to China. We were renewed, ready and excited once more. I turned 30 in 2005 and we immediately completed our paperwork. Our dossier made it to China and was logged in on April 27, 2006. This login date is THE date that holds great importance. April 27, 2006
Upon reentering the adoption process, the estimated wait for a referral (a child being picked for you) from China was 8 months. The number 8. It plagued us throughout our travels. We would feel like we were advancing on that 8 month deadline and then we would get the news. It would be another 8 month wait. Over and over that number 8 would reappear. It seemed a hopeless number. We would never get there. 8 more months. 8 more months. 8 more months!
Where to start? Well, I suppose to understand the significance of an adoption story, you should know the whole story. Our story begins in year 2000, when we realize we won't be having children of our own (disappointment #1). This reality didn't phase us at the time. We instantly started thinking of adoption and a baby from China was what we wanted. By 2002, we were affiliated with an adoption agency and we had our home study completed. In order to adopt from China, we had to be 30 years old. I was yet 26. Disappointment #2, but no worries! We will go somewhere else. That was the plan. We were very excited about the possibilities. We decided on Guatemala and Vietnam. It was these choices that were the cause of my temporary undoing.
If you know me at all, I don't hide my emotions. Well, my excitement was evident as we made our way to the cities to make our final decision of which country to choose. The agency's workshop was the jumping off point for our international adoption. We arrived to find that both of our choices, Guatemala and Vietnam, were closed from US adoptions (disappointment #3). First the loss of our own children, then no children from China and now this. I was devastated. I literally fell to the ground. An awful moment. And our adoption story seemed to end.
The Silk Road got its name from the lucrative Chinese silk trade before and during the first century. This trade route connected many cultures in early times. The Silk Road was successful and long-lived. However, it was also very perilous. Travels were wrought with difficulties; geographical extremes, volatile climates, thieves and poorly marked routes. But the valuable commodities made the venture worthwhile.
Paul and I are not seeking silk, gold or jade. We do not wish for monetary wealth. We travel Our Silk Road for something far more precious...a child. Yet, our route seems no less dangerous than the Silk Road of old.
The original Silk Road spanned across Asia and must have taken a great deal of time to traverse. Five years, Paul and I have been on our journey. One step at a time was our motto. Come face to face with your obstacle and just take the next step. With each step, we would never know if the ground would give away under our feet. And so many times in our travels, the ground did just that, gave way and down we'd go. Sometimes, we would spring up and start again. Other times however we would feel more pain and wish to just lay there. But always, we would dust ourselves off and take the next step.
Our steps in the last two years actually appeared to be going backwards. No progress and very frustrating! But in the last four months, we seem to be in a sprint. Hopefully, a sprint all the way to the end. We feel winded but exhilarated, nervous but excited, afraid yet joyful. The destination is in sight. We are almost there. Come with us!
Come with us and follow in the last stage of our journey to China and back again with baby in hand. Thanks Andrea for the idea of having a blog during this process. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery...right?!
